{I am a Witness. I have a Voice. I Intend to Use it.} Looking Back on Year Two of Being a Writer

There are moments when I hate what’s inside my heart, tarry and thick with things quite undesirable. Learning to be comfortable with yourself, and equally discontent in order to be transformed, is one of life’s most difficult lessons. I’ve just completed year two of “Being a Writer.” OTHERS As I have received affirmation from other writers […]

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Lent Diary: The Mundane, A Holy Awareness, Our body, and Jesus

My first Lenten post is here. These are the indiscriminate observations from days one and two.  Often, I allow dailiness of life to flood in, the tyranny of the urgent family agenda turning me half brain-dead.  Just do the next thing, if grumpily. In The Sign of Jonas, Merton says:  “I ought to know, by now, […]

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Gratitude: A Quiet Discipline, An Offering, A Setting Down, An Unfreezing of the Heart, A Spiritual Continuum

I wake up every day tired, mostly of me. This is how depression repeatedly exposes itself to me, in exhaustion. With each breath and step in the day, with every mundane activity only reinforcing my life’s obvious lack of direction. It is sad. I seem unable to enjoy life. Sometimes I think this is easily solvable.  Do […]

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Life Begins Again and Again: Seeing the Good in Depression

“The words spirit and inspire both derive from the Latin word spirare which literally means to breathe. These emotional highs and lows that we experience are just the natural breathing process of our spirits.”  The Rev. Marcy Ellen, author of The Soul Truth: Reflections for the Waking Soul Yesterday I wrote about what depression feels […]

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I BELIEVE, HELP!

I cannot see the future. That’s what makes today hard faith, not constructs, conjecture or speculation. This is faith in the Present Personal God. And the unknown, unwritten, unlived days ahead, and today a (not so) Simple Practice. Today I have my need, absurdly. My inability to hope beyond a millisecond, my fear, my lack […]

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Waiting to be Born

What is waiting to be born inside me, hope and delicate, childlike faith and courage.  I am wrecked, at the moment.  Empty, consumed, used up and useful to no one. This life is too much to bear. I’m waiting for it. I’m wavering, it is flickering within enough to burn. Bright and on, or out. […]

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A Crack in Your Life, That’s How the Light Gets In

I spent most of my life numb and afraid. I spent the next while trying to fix myself.  Then, I began to let go of control. Now life is a daily letting go. “Maybe you have to have a crack in your disbelief, that’s how the light gets in.” I am fighting, kicking and screaming […]

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{When You are Clutching at Hope}

Is it enough to strive? to want, to work, to try your hardest. Is it enough? There are no guarantees. Friendships flounder, parents betray, marriages flop or fizzle, children flail. life hurts immeasurably sometimes, is it enough to try harder? To do your best, when your best just doesn’t make it all — work — […]

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blue mood
blue mood

“Painting is poetry that is seen rather than felt, and
poetry is painting that is felt rather than seen.”
— Leonardo da Vinci