I lost the month of May
somewhere between watching my mother
suffer extreme pain and mental confusion.
I felt her pass by heavily; Time,
slowed to a crawl
as I was watching.
And now, the month of May is gone.
Time lost cannot be retrieved.
I know this as my friend’s cancer roars in wildly.
This third time more persistent.
And I am heavy with awareness that the months and days of her reprieve, I spent
weighed down with my life.
Gone is the month of May
on bursts of sudden energy, then
languishing in the dark.
Being strong and capable,
as my heart leaked lost time.
I watched the hours tick by at my mother’s bedside.
Time lost forever?
or time spent on forever.
Knowing forever is such a long time.
Friend love stretches on forever.
Mother-daughter love lasts forever too.
Each, a lifetime of forevers found,
to be savored. Still,
the month of May is spent,
costly. On loving.
Or is it simply lost and gone?
We are all lost and found.
I am a friend and daughter.
Love is here, there,
As I sit here thinking
my heart is leaking