{Chasing the Light}


Writing about sobriety puts a pit in my stomach

I am sober

but many days this doesn’t by implication mean happy.  Getting dry

isn’t a formula for bliss.  It is only a pathway toward
When I was a drunk I didn’t feel sensation – there was mostly


I didn’t feel the ache deep inside me, I was smothering it with gin, or wine, or 


These days, I feel all my pain. My skin hurts of it sometimes. 
It’s discomforting to be miserable, but important

that I can feel and know I’m alive.

The most important thing I can say today
is that I’m no expert in sobriety.

I am a Vessel

(the capitalization is important, because I AM ALIVE)

containing my story.

Life is only lived one day at a time. I cannot forget the past but I can forgive.

I’m writing  today about how my sobriety is like Chasing the Light.  Find it at SheLoves magazine.

For those that don’t read me regularly, there are other things I’ve written about my sobriety here and all over my blog.  The heading above are quite helpful, I hope.  Or just search for a topic.

Grace & Peace friends,


3 thoughts on “{Chasing the Light}

  1. You are a vessel, sometimes feeling empty, sometimes overflowing. But what you are filled with defines who you are to be. You are a vessel, a daughter filled with the overwhelming affections of Christ. You are a vessel, filled with words and experiences that in the light of reclamation and restoration gives wisdom, gives hope, and gives possibilities. You are a vessel, in pain yes. Defined by pain, no. Much grace Melody.


  2. Hi Melody,

    I think it safe to say I know the feeling of being a drunk/addict/depressive :)
    I’m learning daily what it means to be living a life based on grace, redemption, and forgiveness.
    I found your blog from your comments over at Tweetspeak – oh, yeah, and I’m a musician.

    You are a gift to others from God. We are all that – so long as we don’t get cocky about it and forget how we got here in the first place, we’ll be well on the way.

    Thanks for sharing :)


Thanks so much for reading and sharing.

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