Originally uploaded by M e l o d y
We recently took our first family camping trip. (It was awesome! Let me get that in before I start rambling about everything else that is going on in my life. Our kids l o v e d it all and want to go again as soon as we can! Yay. As I loved camping as a child, this makes me very happy. I did learn that we haven’t done as well as we might teaching our children the value of hard work. This caused many a “when I was a child” moments on this trip, much to my chagrin.)
We had a little rain, okay a lot of rain! Therefore a wet tent and bedding. And we only had two days, which those of you who camp know isn’t long enough. You should at least plan to stay more days than it took you to pack.
Our planning and packing was very much interrupted by an accident that occurred earlier in the week.
My 72 year old mother, in great health for the most part and living independently, fell and broke her shoulder. Technically fractured her Humerus bone in three places. It is a nasty, painful break and will take some time to recover from, a month in rehab and up to a year of physical therapy.
For me, I think the shock of going from having a completely or seemingly independent parent, to in many ways a dependent one, was immense. I’m still adjusting to having someone ‘need me’ on a daily if not more often basis.
Of course I have small kids (8, 10 and 11) and a 21 year old daughter and two cats, and a hubby, and family in town … but none of their needs compare to this. I am still reeling from the change to my life.
[Right now, sitting here writing this blog entry, is the longest I’ve sat and had complete, uninterrupted thoughts for fifteen days. I’m feeling anxious that I don’t have my cell phone on me, that I’m spending this time on this and not doing my to do list, and well you understand…]
Until my mother is healed, if ever, I and my sister here in town (and our families) are her caregivers.
But I also have two budding pubescents in my house and they are both wild! in their own quirky ways but also driving me i n s a n e. These are the years when you bend over backwards being your most gracious, kind, accommodating self, while your “tween” grows into a loathing, seething, sarcastic, yet needy and fragile, frantic and moody, unpredictable, ungracious, ungrateful mess. Yes, I have an opinion or two about this but I don’t really know what to think long term. And yes, I’m a bit peeved that my sweet darlings have evolved into THAT!
Camping, dependent mother, two tween kids going nuts on me, is just the beginning but I don’t really have time for more today.
4 thoughts on “Is this honestly my life?”
So sorry to hear about this turn of events! (And glad you had fun camping. Come to California to camp–we have multiple tents and it’s almost always dry! We camped at Tahoe this weekend.)
All of our parents have had various health issues (some serious) but they each have a healthy spouse to take most of the burden. I know that won’t always be the case, and the scene you describe is one I contemplate with some trepidation (I know, don’t worry about tomorrow and all that.) Does your mom still live in V?
In other ways, I can totally empathize: I too have an oldest that is 11. Yes. Big change. By turns pouting like a toddler, cuddly like a Kindergartener, forgetful as an old man, and moody as all get out. And this is just the beginning.
I’m happy to have a friend, albeit a virtual one at this point in our lives, to journey with, and blessed by your blog and your honesty, as always.
Oddly, I was reading Scott’s Urbana blog and started surfing around and ended up on two tributes to your dad, so I’ve been thinking a lot about Harrisons today.
I realize that I’m terrible about responding to comments, etc. here, but I wanted you to know I so appreciated this email/comment.
Peace be with you Melody. Sending love and support.