On Silencing Myself

But if I say, “I will not mention his word or speak anymore in his name,” his word is in my heart like a fire, a fire shut up in my bones. I am weary of holding it in; indeed, I cannot.  — Jeremiah 20:9 For days now I have been nursing wounds that feel as new today with each…

No, Not Seven.

“… forgive, from your heart.” Matthew 18:35 So often, when I think of my parents, I know that I need to forgive. Truth be told I am afraid, even though I know that letting go of the past is the only way to move forward.  But I fear the unknown of living looking forward—a life…

Being Merciful with Ourselves

Snow days are good. Slow down. Seek some silence. We need silence in our lives. We even desire it.  But when we enter into silence we encounter a lot of inner noises, often so disturbing that a busy and distracting life seems preferable to a time of silence. Two disturbing “noises” present themselves quickly in…

My Head and My Heart Ache

I woke up “in a state.”  I cannot shake the foreboding I feel.  It conjures up thoughts of very bleak times in my life. But I start my day just like any other by popping out of bed, drinking strong coffee, sitting and opening my heart to the day. Days like this I cannot run…

I am Not Ashamed

      At the end before I quit completely, I was a messy drunk because by then I had to drink a lot to be messed up.   More than I want to admit I had occasions of being a mess, stumbling to bed.  And many, many Sundays I sat through church with the…

Do you ever wonder why we are here?

So, Tom has been experiencing some strange pains in his neck and face — odd twitches and discomforts.  It has gone on  for a long enough period of time that he jokingly calls it his tumor.  But the truth is he is afraid.  We joke about it, then we get serious and a little scared,…